A Picture Perfect Royal Christmas

 

Why?

This may still be October, but since Hallmark has started their official Countdown to Christmas, that means I should start mine too right?

What in the world?

A professional photographer's assistant goes to a foreign country to take pictures while she poses as said professional photographer. This was all against her will by the way. You can blame her friend for this movie.

Personal thoughts

This movie was actually kind of fun to watch. I mean my family is a sucker for royal Christmas movies and so this would have been watched one day anyway. I hated when he fell and did that knee thing. It just didn't flow naturally and it was stupid as heck. I mean why would a prince trip on a carpet. No, you can't make the argument of her being pretty. That's not a real reason to trip. The king's chief of protocol was an interesting character and he would have been the best character if he didn't do anything he wanted. He also helped out the main evil lady because he's in love with her which is so unrealistic like come on. She barely even gave him the time of day. He also would say, "It is I, Stanley Chief of Protocol, " which was a nice thing to hear every now and then. Oh, the main lady's friend had weird, drunk energy the whole movie which didn't really seem like the vibe because it was usually nighttime and I don't know what was happening there. 

Score

I have to give this movie a 6 out of 10. The way they caught the evil lady so the main lady could have redemption was pretty hilarious, but the entirety of the schemes were just too much. I didn't need an incident to occur at almost every event she needed to take pictures at. There were seven events and a million lines of plot. It just didn't really even out in the end. The queen was also the biggest hypocrite I've ever seen in a movie. I have no idea what any of her motivation was, but near the end she just has a sudden shift because her husband had to remind her of the past. It was like weird queen amnesia.

Watch what you love,

Your fellow film watcher

The Dragon Spell

 

Why?

I wanted to have something on while I did homework and decided to see what Tubi recommended. Tubi didn't really recommend anything good so I decided to find this instead. 

What in the world?

Some kid whose dad murdered a dragon ends up going to destroy said dragon. The dragon spirit was never destroyed that's why that is a valid statement. He ends up collaborating with a bat and they both find romance. 

Personal thoughts

I enjoyed this movie a little bit. I mean the jokes were not very good and the characters were kind of stupid. I mean the one person was clearly a girl but they kept saying he which confused me. I mean I get what they were doing but once they found out she was a girl things went down hill. The one kid said she looked beautiful and they shared a glance. Not just like a regular glance like a love glance. AND THE BAT FOUND LOVE! I hated that bat so much because he was the comic relief but he sucked at his job. I mean he literally was so annoying. He ended up kissing a squirrel and it ruined me. It was so awful.

Score

I have to give this movie a 4 out of 10. The movie started off pretty great and then it started to go down hill. The girl was basically in denial about her magic powers and just thought that animals loved her. That was pretty strange. I did not like how every character we followed ended up with someone or something like a squirrel. I will not get over that it was really bad. 

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Your fellow film watcher

Osmosis Jones

 

Why?

I figured it had been a while since I watched a movie and decided to head to Tubi to see if I could find anything. I ended up watching this one because it seemed like a bad movie that was animated.

What in the world?

A white blood cell in an idiot zookeeper tries to stop him from being killed by the Red Death. Oh this movie is half animated and half real people by the way. It's not creepy at all.

Personal thoughts

I didn't find myself enjoying this movie as much as I usually do. I mean watching a movie in general because I had never seen this movie. It was kind of just really shocking every time it switched from animation to the real people. There were actually a couple of famous people in the movie like Chris Rock and Bill Murray. Oh there was this weird part with fake eyelashes on a school bus which was actually essential to the plot. I won't spoil why they are important just know that they were and it was very strange. 

Score

I have to give this movie a 3 out of 10. The jokes were really bad and it was kind of painful to get through. Kind of like (blast from the past) Wownow but without any actual enjoyment. My sister walked in near the end and probably regretted everything that she saw. That's ok though because it ended and we were all thankful.

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Your fellow film watcher

Christmas Mail

 

Why?

My sister and I watched a YouTuber (Drew Gooden) talk about it and decided to give it a watch for ourselves. We watched this in Christmas in July though so it's legal.

What in the world?

A mailman is trying to get dirt on a mail lady who is trying to write letters as Santa back to kids. That's about the whole plot.

Personal thoughts

This movie is wild. I mean it was pretty great with the inconsistencies, but it felt like it was lacking things. The dog was barely in it which was a let down but other than that it was pretty good. The romance felt like it was lacking. There was also a weird lady in the movie which didn't make sense as a person. She was a person but her role to the main man was very confusing. Did they date once? Are they just super close friends? Nobody will ever know. The ending of this movie is wild because you would never be able to guess what it is based off the title. 

Score

I have to give this movie a 6 out of 10. I found enjoyment while watching this movie which I haven't been able to say about some of the other ones recently. Maybe I found it more enjoyable because I had seen someone else watch it but it's hard to pinpoint it. There were some weird parts where the dialogue was just plain awful. That was probably the best part of the movie just the dialogue. Oh the sprinkle fight was good too. 

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Your fellow film watcher

Deck the Heart

 

Why?

I had seen this movie last year, but I wanted to expose my grandma and sister to it. That's the whole reason we watched this movie.

What in the world?

A businessman is about to inherit his dead grandfather's house in Maine. He has to plan a party so he hires an event planner. Romance ensues.

Personal thoughts

This movie sucks. I can't help but love it though. I mean the acting in this movie is so bad which gives it all the charm it needs. The main guy is so robotic and that makes him really great. The two people weren't good and they were boring but the movie was good. Not really. It made my sister and grandma feel pain. That was not the intent. Casualties to the movie. There was this great scene where the girl is unconscious from the cold and he just puts blankets on her. That was funny. They also don't really show you much of the decoration or anything exciting. 

Score

I have to give this movie a 1 out of 10. Since this movie leaves a lot to the imagination, I have to give it a low score. I mean it did cause mental pain to my family, but that's besides the point. Oh and for a family Christmas party there was a lot of random people showing up. I mean the guy just kept inviting people which is odd. 

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Your fellow film watcher

A Furry Little Christmas

 

Why?

Christmas in July should be as good a reason as any. This movie was also found on Tubi making it a two for one kind of thing.

What in the world?

A veterinarian from Vermont that lives in New York to go home to spend Christmas with her dad. When buying her Frosted Flakes, she meets a handsome young doctor who doesn't even buy the Frosted Flakes. They fall in love before the holidays.

Personal thoughts

This movie was even more enjoyable than the other ones we have watched this July. I mean it was still painful because they were doing weird things. The woman's kid was kind of annoying, but I shall give him the kid pass. I'm still upset about the unresolved Frosted Flakes conflict. I mean that's the whole reason they had an interaction and he didn't even buy them. They legitimately showed him putting them back on the shelf and walking away. It was very infuriating. For a movie that revolved around furry creatures, there was a serious lack of animals in this movie. Sure she made some house calls to people but they never actually showed the animals. I mean they did show a goat bleeding but that was about it.

Score

I have to give this movie a 4 out of 10. It was actually interesting to watch in a hypnotic kind of way. We were losing our minds the entire time and by the end we were actually insane. My grandma and I both thought a cup was a little race car. Anyway, the movie didn't have enough furry creatures to make it an actually good rating. Banjo was the only good thing and he was barely in it. Banjo is a dog and he deserved to be in it more. He also ate some dough and got sick but that's besides the point. He was the best part of that movie for sure.

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Your fellow film watcher

A Christmas Recipe for Romance

 

Why?

It's still Christmas in July so that means more romance movies. It's also a good time to pull out Hallmark Bingo. 

What in the world?

A quiet inn is really in debt and the owner needs to compete in a competition to earn enough money to stay afloat. She takes advantage of one of her guests and makes them teach her how to cook. They eventually fall in love.

Personal thoughts

This movie was really painful. I mean there weren't many Christmas activities taking place and the main people were painful to watch. I mean the lady was manipulative as all get out and the guy was just so depressing. He had no emotion to anything and he had a really bad accent. The old people in this movie were very odd. They called everybody dear. That would freak me out and a lot of other people as well. 

Score

I have to give this movie a 2 out of 10. It felt painfully long and like I wanted to rip my eyes out. That's a bit harsh but it went a little like that. Oh there wasn't even a conflict between the two main characters. I mean there was a conflict, but that wasn't even resolved very well. They just let it be water under the bridge. Some guy threatened and sabotaged a man's career and got away with it. I mean that's not even fair but everyone seemed ok with it. This movie was just painful.

Watch what you love,

Your fellow film watcher