Turkey Day

 Why?

I wanted to watch this one before Thanksgiving but sometimes things just don't appear in schedules. I remembered it the day after Thanksgiving and decided to give it a watch.

What in the world?

The mascot of Thanksgiving becomes mind controlled by the Count Dracula. He is sent back in time so that Thanksgiving will be gone forever or something.

Personal thoughts

I just don't even know what to say about Wownow movies at this point. I love to hate them and I love to watch them at the same time. I couldn't tell if this movie was for children or for smart adults. The movie literally threw in words that I had never heard of before. I hated being introduced to new and old characters alike with the introduction of the most terrifying turkey I have ever seen (the above picture does not do the character enough horrible justice). 

Score

I have to give this movie a 2 out of 10. As always, the animation was as great as it could be. It had its moments and I respect that from this movie. Remember, Wownow is not for the faint of heart so if you want to watch this movie then you have been warned. 

Watch what you love,

Your fellow film watcher

Princess Switch 3: Romancing the Star

 

Why?

It's that time of the year where Christmas reigns supreme. As a new tradition, Netflix series have become a holiday staple for me and my family. When we heard there was a 3rd Princess Switch, we knew we had to watch it. 

What in the world?

Vanessa Hudgens teams up with Vanessa Hudgens, Vanessa Hudgens, and some guy named Peter to steal back a religious Christmas tree topper. 

Personal thoughts

Don't watch this movie. It was painfully long and staring at Vanessa Hudgens on a screen for too long possibly did irreparable damage to my brain. Nothing happened in this movie. The bad guy was creepy but he was also possibly the best part of the movie. The whole heist aspect just did not emulate the classic Christmas vibes the other ones had. 

Score

I have to give this movie a 1 out of 10. The green screen nonsense was really the only good part of the movie. The rest of it was boring and predictable but what else was to be expected of romance movies. NOTHING HAPPENED IN THIS MOVIE AND IT WAS 1 HOUR AND 46 MINUTES LONG!!!!!

Watch what you love,

Your fellow film watcher

Love Birds

 

Why?

It's been a while since I have taken a look at Wownow and this movie seemed like the perfect one to dip my toes back into the weird water of the Wownow world. 

What in the world?

Don't let the picture deceive you. This movie is not about these two weird looking birds at all. Instead it is about a hippo who wants to sing a love song for a weird looking newt. It is also about a bird trying to get rid of Valentine's day for reasons completely unrelated to anything that happens in this movie regarding plot. 

Personal thoughts

This movie man. I love when these movies have Little Wings Hot Quills. Don't hate me if that is not his correct name. His songs are one of the best parts of any Wownow movie. The movie description says Cupid but he shows up in the last 10 minutes of the movie. Everything in this movie has no meaning. 

Score

I have to give this movie a 2 out of 10. I do not believe that there was a plot until it was forced in at the very end. Since it was supposed to be a musical, songs were included in the scoring of this movie. They were all trash except for the part when the bird sang about getting influenza. That was pretty great. 

Watch what you love,

Your fellow film watcher

Sherlock Holmes and The Valley of Fear

 

Why?

I was trapped in a room for an unspecified amount of time so I had to try and find something shorter to watch. This movie had a nostalgic look to it so I thought I would watch it. 

What in the world?

An animated rendition of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's Sherlock Holmes and the Valley of Fear. In short, a guy turns up dead and they search for the person that committed the crime. 

Personal thoughts

It reminded me of Scooby Doo. The original not any of the remakes that are around today. The movie also had a lot of twists and turns that I was not expecting whether it was because I had never read the book or was just generally surprised at what they could throw out onto the screen. 

Score

I have to give this movie a 7 out of 10. The animation brought me a time when I wasn't alive but everything was a lot simpler than right now. The best part of the movie had to be the secret passage/hideaway. No more spoilers past that because that would ruin the whole scene. 

Watch what you love,

Your fellow film watcher

The Legend of Sasquatch

 Why?

Something about the trailer for this movie grabbed my attention. I think it was the way that the dad talked to me. It was very beautiful in ways that you could never have really predicted. 

What in the world?

Two daughters and their dad move to a shed looking building in the middle of a valley. In the short time they are there, the daughters find the Bigfoot community and help them survive.

Personal thoughts

I believe that the animation is terrifying. Other than that, why can the Bigfoot people fly? It's very unsettling to watch but it is also really funny to watch what happens in the movie. The dad talks in a very monotonous voice that tops anything I have ever heard before. The Bigfoot community has never learned English though so they have no dialogue. That just makes it all the better. 

Score

I would have to give this movie a 3 out of 10. The giant pinecones sadly brought it up a point grade. I think as a comparison the pinecone was just as big as my hand. The movie was really funny even though I think that I laughed at all the wrong moments but that's not the point. 

Watch what you love,

Your fellow film watcher

Wheely

 

Why?

Just another movie that was found through the power of Amazon prime rabbit holes. 

What in the world?

An ex-racer turned taxi has to save his pretend girlfriend from a "carnapping". Throughout the movie, "hilarious" antics ensue as he tries to get her to be with him. 

Personal thoughts

I believe that this movie was just a sad Cars. The main character was one of the most annoying people I have ever met. He's not even real. I do have to say that some of the cars were cruelly treated. The security car was the best and most confusing character of the whole movie. 

Score

I have to give this movie a 3 out of 10. The movie was actually pretty entertaining for the way that everything was presented. The cars were kind of freaky now that I think back to it.

Watch what you love,

Your fellow film watcher

Barbie: Dreamtopia (Movie)

 

Why?

Taking a break from Wownow is hard. So instead, I had to go down a prime rabbit hole instead or Tubi TV, I don't really remember what the source is.

What in the world?

Barbie allows her sister, Chelsea, to go into lucid fever dreams. The reason for this is too dumb to actually type down for you to read.

Personal thoughts

I believe that this movie is awful. Sure, it has its moments but at the same time it just doesn't really work for me. There were two plots going on at the same time and I personally believe that that was overkill.

Score

This movie gets a 2 out of 10. I know Barbie is supposed to be an icon but this movie just did not exemplify anything of importance. Sadly, Otto did not carry the movie as far as I thought he would. He does bring up a lot of questions that I will not go into.

Watch what you love,

Your fellow film watcher

The Jumbo Movies

 

                              Jumbo                             

Why?

Gonna keep this one short and sweet. I fell down a trailer rabbit hole.

What in the world?

An elephant wants to compete in a spelling bee but uh oh he gets cursed with amnesia by an evil frog.

Personal thoughts

I literally thought I knew how to spell words but when they would spell them, I would get them wrong. That was a huge shock to me and my mom. We both did the same thing. I have to say that my favorite character in this one didn't get enough screen time. He was an evil, voodoo snail who ate deer. Never on screen because that would be traumatizing. 

Score

I would have to give this movie a 3 out of 10. Unsurprisingly, it's not fun to watch animals spell out words for over an hour. I did find it funny how they gave an elephant amnesia that was pretty cool on their part. 

Jumbo 2

Why?

It's what I like to call a movie marathon. I will not confirm or deny if it was a good marathon or not.

What in the world?

As a follow-up to the other one, Jumbo has depression and his old arch nemesis just wants to beat box.

Personal thoughts

Ok let me address the picture. There was virtually no pictures of this movie so I had to improvise. Anyway, they did my guy Bert, the frog, dirty in this one. They showed him little to no respect and he deserved better. His talent would have gotten him far. Their is really no exciting plot in this one but Jumbo feels the need to put himself into everyone's life which is just stupid if you ask me.

Score

I have to give this movie a 2 out of 10. Although it did have beatboxing, that was not enough to save this film. The voice actors had changed but all of the voice actors were the same (just Wownow things). Jumbo didn't even tell that good of jokes yet they all thought that his jokes were the best thing ever. Never encourage someone that is bad at what they do. No one needs that little self-esteem boost even if it is a formerly famous elephant.

Watch what you love,

Your fellow film watcher

Dia of the Dead

Why?

I saw the trailer for this movie when I was just looking at trailers one day. I knew that it was something that I just needed to watch and of course it was the behemoth Wownow.

What in the world?

A little boy, (he's 8), goes into the world of the dead so that he can dance for his mom in a singing competition. He is accompanied by his dad who just doesn't care about anything to be honest. 

Personal thoughts

Okay why doesn't anyone in this movie wear a shirt. All the skeletons wear shirts and they're dead. Anyway, Momo (the grim reaper of the moors) deserves better than what happened to him. He didn't get to lead anyone to the River Styx. Also, the dad just punches a skeleton without knowing his motivation. Yes, he was after the dad, but at the same time the dad did not know that and just straight beat him up.

Score

I would have to give this movie a 4 out of 10. The singing competition was the stupidest thing that they could have thought of but I really enjoyed all the little skeleton extras. They were wearing the best hat things I have ever seen and they all looked so comfy.

Watch what you love,

Your fellow film watcher

Dave of the Dead

 

Why?

Halloween was recent so of course I had to watch a Halloween movie. Yes this post is in November, I'm a bit late to this party.

What in the world?

A fast food employee has to go save the world from Count Dracula. His master plan is to use pumpkin holograms to throw every planet into a state of chaos perfect for endless Halloween.

Personal thoughts

I can't believe I watched a movie about a fast food employee. The manager of Dave was just so weird. Also Count Dracula didn't pay 8 space dollars and 95 space cents so that makes up the whole motivation of Dave. He must really be the best fast food employee because I'm sure no one would care that much if that much money went missing.

Score

I have to give this movie a 3 out of 10. Although it should have been interesting, the movie just wasn't. It did introduce a lot of new Wownow characters but that wasn't enough to save this film. The characters were boring and Dracula is one of the worst villains ever and not in a good way. 

Watch what you love,

Your fellow film watcher

The WOWNOW Experiment

 

What?

This post is a bit different than my other reviews. Since Wownow is probably a cash grab studio, I decided to see how others who aren't desensitized would react to these movies. I decided to pick three members of society and get them to watch whatever Wownow film I picked. Let's figure out the verdict.

My Mother: Literally Almost Every Film

I love my mother and I would never want to subject her to unwanted torture. She has been on this Wownow film adventure since the very beginning and she's in it for the long haul. She hasn't become desensitized just yet but she's getting there. I can't even remember the first movie we saw that was Wownow. It has become a staple in this household when we have free time and I can't honestly tell you if that is a good or a bad thing.

My Sister: The Thanksgiving Movie

Yes, yes. I know I already used this picture but I thought it would make this more memorable. She couldn't stand the way that they did things. Sure they stand, walk, and talk a lot but that doesn't make it any worse than let's say Marvel. She couldn't make it a full movie without trying to seek help from our mom to get out of the situation. We ended up watching the whole movie anyway. I think she's still a bit broken from the experiment though. She'll be fine. 

My Best Friend: Under the Sea 2

Shout out to my best friend who will literally put up with anything. I have to say that this experiment did not have the same control factors as the other two. I stopped the movie. That's right...I stopped the movie because it did a Pup Scouts. I couldn't take the endless loop of stories that made no sense. He seemed to enjoy the movie even though it was terrible as all get out. I don't think he honestly would have made it through the whole thing though. The only good thing was the words, "Grand theft aqua".

Conclusion

Wownow is not for the faint of heart. If you're looking for something to put on to get some kid to go to bed then find Wownow. No one can stand it for long periods of time unless they have been highly conditioned to do so. I have also decided not to stop watching Wownow because I still find it amusing and mind numbing which is exactly what you need sometimes.

Watch what you love,

Your fellow film watcher