Ben-Hur

 

Why?

This movie was also recommended by Tubi. I think I need to expand my movie horizons just a tad. 

What in the world?

An old man is narrating the novel of Ben Hur written by some dead guy in Indiana.

Personal thoughts

This movie was something else. I mean it does kind of make sense why it wasn't that good but I can't stop thinking about the old guy narrator. He would do these random turns to look at different camera angles and I honestly loved it so much. It's probably going to get me through the days honestly. Oh actual storywise there was nothing of note there. I mean it was the telling of a story.

Score

I have to give this movie a 7 out of 10 almost based solely on the narrator. The animation was absolutely atrocious at times and I loved every minute that I had to look at some differently animated horses running around a track. The people were ok I think but the angels shone blue for some reason which was an artistic choice that didn't make sense to me but I could understand it. 

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Bugville

 

Why?

It was recommended by Tubi and I just felt like I had to watch it. I mean this guy sleeps in a compact so.

What in the world?

Humans are destroying Bugville I suppose and they have to try and find somewhere to live or the "cute" bee will have to marry a beetle for land.

Personal thoughts

I thought this movie was pretty weird. I mean that's normal and all but the sexualization of a bee was very strange to me. It was only one bee though so I can't complain too much. I just thought that was really weird in how it was framed out. I also thought that none of the characters should have been redeemed and the two henchmen should have found their way into Bugtopia. I made up that name so don't look it up like it's a real thing. 

Score

I have to give this movie a 6 out of 10. It was pretty entertaining but I mean I didn't like some of the bugs. The dialogue was weird as well and the cigar exploding. Don't even get me started on that. That was awful and made no sense. The old man bee was probably my favorite character if I had to pick one. 

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Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde

 

Why?

I'm just on that Tubi recommended movie grind when I have nothing better to do.

What in the world?

An animated version of the literary classic Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde.

Personal thoughts

This movie was wild. I mean the mere fact that it says murder is bizarre for a kid's animation. I mean they didn't show anything which was a disappointment but they mentioned it. Mr. Hyde was absolutely horrendous and I have done you a favor by not picturing him here. His motivations will never make sense to me but that's alright because I don't really need to understand him. Oh they used a cat to have reactions to things so that you could react that way too. That was just weird and uncalled for honestly. 

Score 

I have to give this movie a 5 out of 10. It did its basic job and nothing more. I mean the animation wasn't even that bad it's just that nothing exciting happens. I thought it was a musical at first and was terrified as to what was going to happen but then it just wasn't. That was kind of disappointing but I was grateful that I didn't have to hear anyone sing about anything science related. 

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Shockwaves

 

Why?

This movie came highly, highly recommended so I just had to watch it. 

What in the world?

A family has to come together so that they can get in a bunker to avoid the disastrous earthquake.

Personal thoughts

This family kind of sucks. I mean at first Peter was okay but then he devolved. The rest of the family was iffy in the first place so it didn't really matter. They oh my gosh. They hit someone with their car and kept going. The thing is this person gave Peter her car so it's like ten times worse. How they didn't see her is beyond me. Also the picture for this is my favorite enigma of the movie. That can't be a person. It just doesn't make sense. He like immediately dies but he was one of my favorite parts. There's so much to say about this movie but I can't give everything away. 

Score

I have to give this movie a 3 out of 10. I mean it was an interesting movie once you looked past all of the walking. It gets real heavy and intense near the end when the earthquake is supposed to be happening. Sidenote. If you plan on watching this movie for whatever beware the end credits scene. It's nowhere near Marvel level and it's just really bad. 

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Aladdin and the Adventure of All Time

 

Why?

My recommended for Tubi has drastically changed from shark movies to animated escapades of already made characters. It seemed like a good watch at the time.

What in the world?

Aladdin is transported into the future by a bookworm and then they go through history fixing characters somehow. For example, Blond beard into Blackbeard.

Personal thoughts

This movie wasn't that bad. I can see how people would watch that, but the animation was just really ugly to me. I mean it was ok but like it was not the best thing I have seen. The movement felt blocky and not smooth as one would think. I laughed at one of the kids because his voice was just deep, and it was unexpected and intimidating. Also, I always seem to find the musicals because boy did this movie have a song for every character. 

Score

I have to give this movie a 5 out of 10. It's about what you would expect from one of these kinds of movies so that was nice to know the expected. I really did not like how any of the characters moved and thought it was just awkward and strange. I do like how the grandpa said a clock got struck by lightning even though it was clearly inside and would have been completely fine during the storm. 

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Sharktopus

 

Why?

After finishing a different movie, we saw a title for a sequel to one of these movies and decided that we have to watch this one first.

What in the world?

A half shark, half octopus creature is going around the Southern Coast and killing people for food and for fun. People are trying to stop him.

Personal thoughts

This movie was a step above Poseidon Rex. This movie had lots of music in it and actually zero likeable characters. Actually, wait no it had likeable characters just not ones that survived. Santos and Bones were the best and then got absolutely destroyed both on and off screen. I am glad that my least favorite characters died that was nice.

Score

I have to give this movie a 7 out of 10. I was rooting for Sharktopus the whole time because he seemed like he was helping humanity by getting rid of the stupid people. It was kind of freaky that he could go on land, but good news is he couldn't go on land for long periods of time, so it didn't even make sense anyway.

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Poseidon Rex

 

Why?

This movie has been on my radar for a while now and I finally got to watch it today.

What in the world?

A t-rex that was living under water surfaced after an explosion woke it up.

Personal thoughts

This movie was pretty good. I don't like how they only had one song throughout the entire thing. It wasn't even that good. It did fake me out one time by starting with a different part of the song than what I thought. The characters in this movie were so weird I can't even.

Score

I have to give this movie a 6 out of 10. If the song would have been different that would have bumped it up to a 7. The people who survived were not the people I thought were going to survive so that was surprising. I think that Rod should have been alive at the end but it's his own fault he fell out of the boat and got stomped on or something. Rod never backed down though. The animation they decided to use for some things was top notch though and definitely realistic looking. Totally. 

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20,000 Leagues Under the Sea (1985)

 

Why?

I keep getting books turned into movies recommended to me on Tubi. Granted, they are short and just what I need to keep going with my day.

What in the world?

It's just like the book probably. With Captain Nemo the insane and Ned the ever hungry.

Personal thoughts

Alright this movie was kind of boring. Ned wouldn't stop complaining and I just wanted him to shut up. I did find it funny how they just kind of left everyone in the ocean even though it sounded like the man overboard horn was going off. Captain Nemo was a freaking weirdo. I mean I get it man, but you could at least explain some things to them so that I know what's going on. 

Score

I have to give this movie a 3 out of 10. I did enjoy it a little bit, but I have no prior experience with this book, so I had no idea what was actually going on. I did enjoy Captain Nemo saving the one thing. Environmentalism is pretty cool let's be honest. I mean it's a short movie and I hate how it ends with the weirdest cliffhanger ending which just left me confused. I mean they didn't need to add that line and then the panning shot after it. Just saying. 

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Pickwick Papers

 

Why?

It just started after King Solomon's Mines, and I didn't want to get up and turn it off. So here we are.

What in the world?

I can't accurately describe what this movie even is. Pickwick goes around learning things so that he can make a book or something.

Personal thoughts

This movie was something else. I can see why it isn't really the best thing, but I mean it was pretty great when you were paying attention. It even had recurring characters that I thought were just a one-time thing to fulfill the part in the book. I don't know maybe I'm just weird like that. I do know that I shall never forget the name Gabriel Grub. We love Gabriel Grub.

Score

I have to give this movie a 6 out of 10. It wasn't good but it also wasn't bad. If I rated this higher than King Solomon's Mines, I will be surprised but not that surprised. This movie was only slightly better than that one. I use that one as reference because it was one after the other so the bias kicks in. Oh, I almost forgot that Pickwick almost dies so that was pretty interesting and intense.

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King Solomon's Mines

 

Why?

I wanted to watch something animated while I ate lunch and this one appeared, or I searched for it or something. I can't remember.

What in the world?

Some Englishmen are looking for an English guy's lost brother so that he does not have to be pronounced dead.

Personal thoughts

I kind of enjoyed this movie. I know, I know that's weird, but it had some charm to it. I laughed when the character was narrating something and then it just cut to him saying that same thing. That tickled me and I don't know exactly why. The weird side plot with the Kaukauna tribe was very weird and didn't make sense with the movie. Come to think of it that's when the guy stopped narrating too. Hmmm.

Score

I have to give this movie a 5 out of 10. It had its moments which I enjoyed but the plot was so hard to keep track of that I just kind of gave up keeping track and just enjoyed it for what it was. It kind of reminded me of the Sherlock Plumtum kind of thing which means that it's some of the best content out there.

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Reptisaurus

 

Why?

It was recommended to me by Tubi themselves. 

What in the world?

The military is trying to stop their own creation while some college kids are there. They are supposed to be on a deserted island by the way.

Personal thoughts

This movie was boring. The beginning started off strong and then nothing happened until the end of the movie. I think it took about until after the 40-minute mark for anything else to happen. I didn't like any of the main characters so if they happened to die, I wasn't that sad about it.

Score

I have to give this movie a 2 out of 10. Like I said, nothing happened in this movie, and it shows. I mean the general was a kind of crazy dude, but he didn't really do anything other than get people killed, try to get people killed, and he would sit in a chair for no reason. Oh, if you're curious about how many people were left at the end it was 4.

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Terrordactyl

 

Why?

This movie started playing after the other one and I didn't have the heart to turn it off.

What in the world?

Pterodactyls have come from space and are trying to repopulate their species on the Earth. Some lawncare guys, a bartender, her roommate, and a drunk team up to stop them.

Personal thoughts

This movie was interesting. I enjoyed it for the most part. I mean the baby pterodactyls were ugly, but I couldn't find a picture of them sadly. The main protagonists were kind of lame and the drunk was the coolest guy. He was a former marine or Navy or something and he was the main hero in the end. Spoiler but I won't tell you how he was the main hero. 

Score

I have to give this movie a 7 out of 10. I loved Sampson aka the drunk. He was the best part of the movie and was basically invincible. You'd know what I meant if you watched the movie. The rest of the characters other than Lars could have died because they didn't do much other than complain really. 

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Age of Dinosaurs

 

Why?

My recommended is full of dinosaurs because I watched one dinosaur movie. Might as well take a deep dive am I right?

What in the world?

Some huge company brought dinos back from the dead and have to face off against them.

Personal thoughts

This movie was ok at best. I mean my favorite dinosaur was Larry (seen above). He got in his kills and I think he survived the whole movie. Don't quote me on that I can hardly remember. I didn't have a favorite character in this movie and I kind of just wanted them all to die. I mean they brought the dinos from an enclosed area into a "crowded" mall. Not their brightest move but it didn't seem to do too much damage to them either so cool I guess.

Score

I have to give this movie a 4 out of 10. While my interest was piqued sometimes I just couldn't care much about this movie. Sure the girl had a dead parent but what did it matter in the plot. It didn't that's right. I mean the dad was kind of cool but he didn't die so there's nothing to say there.

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Cowboys vs. Dinosaurs

 

Why?

This movie came highly recommended from my mother, so I just had to watch it.

What in the world?

After people mine for iridium, dinosaurs are set loose on what I can only assume is a southern town.

Personal thoughts

This movie was something else. Kind of wanted everyone to die but alas 3 people ended up living. There was a girl who was just kind of there and I didn't even know her name. She survived surprisingly. Quaid and Joe were the only good characters the whole time I mean besides the dinosaurs that is. Also, Quaid is an amazing name, and I don't know if I liked the name or the guy better. There wasn't really a main character in this so I can't complain about that. 

Score

I have to give this movie a 6 out of 10. I mean the dinosaurs were amazing and the introduction of new dinos over halfway through the movie was something else. I mean it added fan favorites like the triceratops and dilophsaurus. The lady shouldn't have had any love interests but that's just a personal thing. Both of her love interests were bad for her, and she should have just stayed single when he lost the bull riding or rodeo or whatever. 

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Global Meltdown

 

Why?

It was late at night and this movie was just so enthralling.

What in the world?

Yellowstone is erupting. Maybe?

Personal thoughts

This movie was awesome. It got rid of almost everyone in the film including an entire RV of people at the same time. I mean it was pretty great if I'm being honest. The main character was holding back the expedition the entire time and she should have met a grisly end, but I guess she is the main character. Mayor Wally was my favorite though. He didn't do anything, but he became blind. He was just cool ok.

Score

I have to give this movie an 8 out of 10. It was good but not as good as some of the other things I have seen. I mean some things just can't be beat. Davis dying was kind of unexpected because he seemed like he was going to be important. He took up way too much screen time to just die like that. I will say that the ending sucks and that they all should have died. Well, everyone except Wally really. Not the case though so boooo.

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Rock Dog

 

Why?

My family saw this and thought that we should watch it so that is exactly what we did.

What in the world?

Instead of protecting a mountain, this dog just wants to play some rock and roll man.

Personal thoughts

This movie was actually ok. The sheep were the stupidest characters (rightfully so) and it just made the movie even better I think. The plot was garbage and the ending was predictable. I mean come on you could see the ending coming from about two thousand miles away.

Score

I have to give this movie a 5 out of 10. It was just an average movie for me. I wasn't really feeling the feels with this one as much as I think they wanted me to. The animals in this movie were just kind of blah and didn't really have any depth to them. 

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Christopher the Christmas Tree

 

Why?

It was short enough to put on to see who would leave the room. SPOILER: No one left the room it was too good.

What in the world?

A Christmas tree is depressed that he can't actually be a Christmas tree.

Personal thoughts

For being a third of the length of an actual movie this was pretty legit. Granted some of the songs were just eck, not all of them were terrible. I think I liked Christopher's song at the end where he talked about his life. Hooty or whatever his name was was amazing. I loved him and would die for him. Thankfully he's not real so I can keep on living. 

Score

I have to give this movie a 6 out of 10. It kept me entertained the entire time and I didn't complain about watching it. Could it have been better of course, but you got to love those old Christmas movies. I mean the president even gave a speech about Christ and Christmas and Christopher. Like what kind of movie would do that nowadays none. What kind of movie would have the tree ready to make his life the ultimate sacrifice to the world. Not any other movie I'm pretty sure.

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Christopher Columbus

 

Why?

I needed something to watch and this was what I happened to choose.

What in the world?

It's what the title says really and there's not much else to it. A lot less than what the title says as well.

Personal thoughts

This movie man. It was not good. The transitions were actual trash and Columbus liked to stare a lot. The only way to tell the passage of time in this movie was his hats. The worst hat though was this ugly green bonnet that he wore when he was relocating. You should never ever have to see this bonnet. But you also should see it just to know what it looks like. I'll spare you here though. 

Score

I have to give this movie a 1 out of 10. Not good man. Not good at all. Go Diego and every other supporting character because Columbus was super boring to follow around the whole time. I did like how they ended the movie with him smashing an egg on a table that was super neat.

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Fixies: Top Secret

 

Why?

Tubi never fails to disappoint. I saw Mystery Man in the trailer/beginning and I knew that I had to watch it.

What in the world?

I um can't begin to describe the plot of this movie. It had everything. Electricity, conspiracy, and falling objects. That's all you really need to know. OH and Tom Thomas. Never forget that name.

Personal thoughts

This movie was weird. I mean the songs were weird but the movie was worse than the songs. Tom Thomas was also barely in the movie but you could tell when he was on screen. Him and his crush were probably the worst part. Oh my gosh I almost forgot about Grandpus. He was a fixie thing and he rode around on a podium. He was honestly the best character. He didn't really do much though even when he tried. He did teach them like one time and that seemed to be good enough for all of them so woohoo.

Score

I have to give this movie a 3 out of 10. It wasn't good by any means but I do have to say that it made me laugh sometimes and that's good enough for me. Not much else to say there really except there was this weird part with kids almost getting married as a distraction but we don't really talk about that.

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The 7 Adventures of Sinbad

 

Why?

My mom found this movie and she had to show it to us and let me tell you it was not a disappointment.

What in the world?

A retelling of Sinbad to keep up with the modernness of the world. Not much else to describe it really. 

Personal thoughts

This movie was very confusing. Don't get me wrong I loved it but there were some parts that just didn't make sense. The guy destroying something. That didn't make sense because it affected him anyway so why did he destroy it? The oceanographer going around on a hot air balloon. That didn't make much sense either. Whatever. 

Score

I have to give this movie a 9 out of 10. I loved it and was confused the whole time. I never really had to wonder when the movie was going to end. SPOILER: They actually kill off a lot more characters than you would originally think, and they also think their CGI is super cool. I have to end this review properly now. CRAAAABBBB!!

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Gila!

 

Why?

This movie has been on my watchlist for a while and figured it was about time.

What in the world?

Some town is being attacked by a giant gila monster affected my nuclear waste, I think.

Personal thoughts

I loved this gila monster. He was amazing and he liked to blow things up. Typical gila monster things. None of the main characters made sense and none of their stories lined up. I highly doubt the characters were in high school but whatever. I also don't think every woman ever would be hitting on the main guy but what do I know. There was drag racing in this movie one time and they made it seem like it was going to be something that kept happening during the movie.

Score

I have to give this movie a 7 out of 10. I enjoyed this movie but Waco and everyone else didn't make any sense. The movie doesn't credit its writers which is kind of suspicious, but I mean nothing really made sense in this movie. There was a kid with polio which didn't really come in anywhere with the plot. Oh, I have to talk about the best character. Sherwood. He had a bunch of guns and the bill of rights in his back pocket. Just a classical American let's be honest. 

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